Day 7

It's been a week since you decided you needed to take a step back and evaluate why you are afraid to take the next step with me.

This is after the phone conversation we had just about a week prior where you said you've been unhappy for the past couple months.

The last time we saw each other was April 9th and I left in a rush without even saying a real good bye.  No hug, no kiss.  What if that ends up being the last time we see each other?  What I would do now to go back to that moment and hug you tightly until the strength in my arms ran out.

I'm not doing very well with this break at all.  I have gotten drunk in my bedroom alone at night twice in the past seven days.  The first time was Thursday night after you told me you needed this time.  I was so hung over, I couldn't even get out of bed the next day.  The second time was last night and I feel almost as bad as I did last time, but I couldn't stay home today too.  Sitting here at work, with nothing to do because there are no sales to call about, tying so hard not to look like a mess.  Feeling queasy from not only being hung over, but also from the perpetual knot in my stomach worrying about what thoughts you've been having about me and our relationship.

Please don't leave me, Eric.  I miss you so much.  I wonder, are you missing me?  Has this been hard at all for you?